The Modern Courtesan Experience

In considering my entry into sex work and knowing well the trajectory I want to take in this serious career, it should come as no surprise that courtesan is my end goal. I made the comment on Serpent's blog that I wanted to find another acronym description, beyond the Girlfriend Experience (GFE) for the relationship established with clients. You see, I have a problem with the title of "girlfriend". It's far too wifey for me and that is the last thing I want to be. I understand the essence, if you will, of the GFE but, as Serpent has demonstrated, some men take "girlfriend" a little too seriously.

It's not that I want to come off as cold, because I'm not. But it is the distance that concerns me. Also, there is this trend I see that begs for a reminder as to what a courtesan, modern-day or not, was and is. So thanks to the always lovely and entertaining Alexa, a post which finally hits the nail on the head for me. A particularly defining quote:

But, while I’d agree that this is a pretty reasonable characterization of what one might consider a modern courtesan, I think she left one critical characteristic out of it. To wit: The Modern Courtesan is sexually articulate and has the requisite experience to know how (and when) to apply the broader concepts of human sexuality to fit the desires and fantasies of her client.

Even though the courtesan is expected to be a Jill of many qualities, and her clients may genuinely enjoy those aspects of her personality, her core purpose is to provide sexual companionship to her client¹. Being sexually articulate means more than just knowing the typical definitions and acronyms that are used in the world of prostitution, knowing a multitude of positions, or knowing how to deep throat.

Yes, exactly! Being a courtesan is hard work and requires study! We need a university. Alexa's post was inspired by that of an Ecuadoran escort, Aina Montero who has coined the new term Modern Courtesan Experience. Damn! Beat me to it! :P

Aina says:

When corresponding with colleagues and potential patrons, I am often asked if I am a “GFE” or if I provide a “girlfriend experience,” but everyone seems to have their own definition of this popular term. Several years ago, when I first saw the term girlfriend experience, it was used primarily by upscale escorts who enforced multi-hour or even multi-day minimum engagements, in order to truly connect with their suitors. These women choose to only see gentlemen whose company they genuinely enjoy, after an extensive screening and acquaintanceship process, thereby allowing them to provide each patron with a level of attentiveness corresponding to a girlfriend, yet without any expectations of marriage. Elite escorts who advertised and provided a girlfriend experience were generally very well-educated, well-traveled, and capable of belonging in any social setting.

Some gentlemen, however, who generally refer to themselves as “hobbyists,” perhaps because they take pleasure in visiting and reviewing as many ladies as possible, have so altered the use of the term GFE that a definition found on many websites includes references to illegal and unsafe activities, such as providing unprotected sex for a fee.

Yes, that last sentence is my problem with the current construction of GFE. I'm sure it is why many women prefer the term companion. Call me a snob, but I like this standard. Some tweaking can be done but overall it's a win in my book.